user
Mediaballs
Issue 1417
commentatorballs
“Kouyate a real threat, with his height and those balls swinging”
ALAN SMITH
Sky Sports

“That’s rubbed wounds into Stoke’s salt”
ROBBIE SAVAGE
Radio 5 Live

“It’s very congested in the middle of the park... all the width is down the flanks”
JOHN HARTSON
Radio 5 Live

“Millwall are breathing down the back of their shorts”
MARK CLEMMIT
BBC1

gnitty
Please email your entries to balls@private-eye.co.uk. £10 paid for submissions printed in the magazine.

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Next issue on sale: 10th May 2016.
gnitty
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In This Issue private eye

Royal 90th Birthday Gnomemart… Don’t Put Hard-Fought Austerity at Risk, pleads Osborne… The Big Bumper President Erdogan Joke Book… Prince William Confronts Work-Shy BBC Royal Corr Nicholas Witchell… Fresh Sightings of Maddie Stories ‘Give Hope’ to Daily Express Editors… Arianna Huffington: The Sleep Revolution, as told to Craig Brown

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- Deepcut: Full report on the inquest into the death of army recruit Cheryl James.
- BVI update: Why the pledge to learn who owns what offshore is a charade.

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Private Eye Issue 1416