Issue 1558
commentatorballs "Jon Rahm is not only the best golfer in the world but he is also the best golfer on this team"
BUTCH HARMON
Sky Sports

"Chelsea are throwing it all at the kitchen sink"
STEVE SIDWELL
BT Sport

"I didn't know what to expect, but it's everything I expected and more"
SHANE LOWRY
RTE Radio 1

"He could face either a heavy ban or a lengthy fine"
RONNIE CHARTERS
STV

"I don't want to score a hat-trick but lose the game 3-2"
ANDREW COLE
Bein Sports

gnitty
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Next issue on sale: 27th October 2021
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ALSO IN THIS ISSUE
ONLY IN THE MAGAZINE
Private Eye Issue 1558
In This Issue
Extra-extra police deployed to watch all the extra police put on streets to make women feel safe…Rumble in the Bungle! Yes, it's the Sunak Fury v Kwasi Wilder big fight… 'I'm a Tory' reveals prominent bisexual woman. 'It's no big deal'… Oligarch couple openly admit using offshore shell company to buy Tory Party… 'OMG!' writes Polly Filler – Britain's au pair shortage now official… 'Met Police make me feel totally safe,' says woman who asks to be identified only as 'Cressida'… Adrian Chiles' Diary, as told to Craig Brown

NHS update
MD on building back healthier

Houses of ill repute
Why dirty money still loves British property

COP26
The climate of mistrust warms up

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Private Eye Issue 1557
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