The Deputy Prime Minister’s WhatsApp Group
Yes, that’s right, the Deputy PM’s WhatsApp Group!!!!!, Issue 1655
PM's WhatsApp Group
Poor old Keir. The one time England wins at football and he’s stuck on a golf course with fatboy Trump!
Keir Starmer
Actually I’m not on the golf course any more. And that is no way to refer to my best friend Donald.
Friend? Ooh – I thought you were just his caddy?
Keir Starmer
No, Angela, I’m not. We have a very equal – and special – relationship. Although on one hole, he did run out of tees, so obviously, as any good friend would, I lay down and puckered up my lips to hold his golf ball in my mouth.
Aren’t you still sucking up to him?
Keir Starmer
I am. I’m sitting right next to him, but he’s started talking to the press, so I’ve got a good hour or so where all I’ve got to do is nod. So I thought I’d join in from up here at his Turnberry golf course.
Darren Jones
Don’t you mean U-Turnberry?
Keir Starmer
You might mock, Darren, but we actually got down to some serious business.
Pat McFadden
Yes, the serious business of advertising his golf courses. It was a cheap stunt.
Keir Starmer
It certainly wasn’t. Membership at Turnberry is £15,000 a year, with a gold Tartan card upgrade for MAGA members, including 1,800% discount on golf tuition and Clan McTrump plaid socks. Hurry, hurry, while offer lasts.
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