COLUMNISTS
Issue 1634
pandemic update
With M.D.: "As a succession of Countess of Chester hospital paediatricians, young and old, are hauled in front of the Thirlwall Inquiry to apologise for not calling the police in sooner to investigate convicted nurse Lucy Letby, a vital question is being ignored. How did all these doctors – including seven consultants with more than one hundred years of collective experience – fail to diagnose multiple deaths by air embolism when…"
agri brigade
With Bio-Waste Spreader: "The relentless fall in UK production of oilseed rape, grown for the manufacture of edible vegetable oils, animal feed and biodiesel, continues. What is causing this decline, and how long until the UK is entirely dependent on imported rapeseed oil or substitutes like palm oil – which encourages rainforest destruction?…"
signal failures
With Dr B Ching: "Despite its enthusiasm for devolution and economic growth, Labour hasn't yet ditched its old apathy towards light rail (modern trams). Taxpayers spent millions on planning light-rail systems for Leeds, Liverpool and Portsmouth before the Labour government axed the lot in 2005. France's versement transport lets communities levy funds from local employers to build and maintain transport systems…"
eye tv
With Remote Controller: "Three weeks into series 22 of Strictly Come Dancing, viewers have learned two quirks of camerawork. Cutaways lingeringly show kneepads in the rehearsal room, while wide shots carefully avoid wall mirrors or window reflections of the chaperone who now sits in. (Although, this week, there was a fleeting glimpse of a lanyard above a laptop while hockey Olympian Sam Quek prepped with partner Nikita Kuzmin. Was that accidental or the BBC's minimal admission that the protocol continues?)…"
keeping the lights on
With Old Sparky: "Last month saw the closures of our last coal-fired power station (Ratcliffe-on-Soar), Scotland's only oil refinery (Grangemouth), and Wales's only primary steel foundries (Port Talbot). Much as Labour likes to take the credit, the ending of coal-fired electricity – a world first for a major industrial nation – is the Tories' achievement: they priced coal out of the market with an additional 2013 tax on carbon emissions…"
music and musicians
With Lunchtime O'Boulez: "The BBC made such a song and dance last week about its BBC Singers' centenary that one could almost forget its cackhanded efforts just 18 months ago to shut them down. It now insists the Singers are a jewel in the crown of public service broadcasting. It would be nice to believe this – along with other recent self-congratulatory PR about the BBC's commitment to arts and culture – but the facts suggest otherwise…"
in the city
With Slicker: "Further proof (if it were needed) that company boards will always look for a way to make sure share incentive schemes for chief executives pay out, irrespective of their supposed alignment to shareholder benefit, has just been provided by the board of budget airline Wizz Air. CEO and co-founder József Váradi's existing £100m bonus scheme, voted through in 2021 and extended by two years last year…"
eye world
Letter from Baku
From Our Own Correspondent:
"How does a cash-rich autocratic regime shift attention away from its poor human-rights record, boost nationalism and project its status on the world stage? Why, launch a glossy rolling international news channel, of course! Azerbaijan's leader, Ilham Aliyev, is lifting directly from the playbook of other strongman governments such as Russia's Vladimir Putin and Turkey's Recep Tayyip Erdo?an with his own vanity project…"
To read all these columnists and more in full, get the latest edition of Private Eye - you can subscribe here and have the magazine delivered to your home every fortnight.

Next issue on sale: 23rd October 2024
gnitty
MORE TOP STORIES ONLINE
Hard reboot
Hard reboot
CQC gives up on its IT system
In The Back, Issue 1634
Bob's worth
Bob's worth
A reminder of Jenrick's failings
HP Sauce, Issue 1632
Litter louts
Litter louts
Puppy breeders upset the taxman
In The Back, Issue 1632
ALSO IN THIS ISSUE
ONLY IN THE MAGAZINE
Private Eye Issue 1634
In This Issue
Rock attack solves Middle East crisis once and for all… Netanyahu popularity rockets after missile attacks… US politics hit new low… The Sound of Music, re-jack-booted… Who will replace Gary Lineker as non-controversial host of Match of the Day?… Conspiracy update: Second moon special… Small island given away… Pin the Chagos archipelago on the Indian Ocean… Down the centuries with ITV's Loose Women, as told to Craig Brown

Friendless zones
The UK's freeports are hives of inactivity

Rogue landlord
The Duchy of Cornwall's "feudal rule" on the Scilly Isles

Sunday worst
Turmoil at the Guardian over the Observer sale

Read these stories and much more - only in the magazine. Subscribe here to get delivery direct to your home and never miss an issue!
ONLY £2.99
SUBSCRIBE HERE
NEXT ISSUE ON SALE
23rd October 2024
WHY SUBSCRIBE?
Private Eye Issue 1633
MORE FROM PRIVATE EYE