Issue 1654
commentatorballs "All eight legs, 16 feet moving in the same direction at the same time"
NATASHA HUNT, Sky Sports

"The goalkeeper suffered from cramp... which is not a physical thing"
HELEN WARD, Radio 5 Live

"Hulkenberg pulls out and finds a damp patch"
DAVID CROFT, Sky Sports F1

"You're a very self-defecating... deprecating is the word I just said, a self- deprecating man"
MATT RENDELL, ITV4

"Is it possible to edit out Gregg Wallace's bits?"
NAGA MUNCHETTY, Radio 5 Live

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Private Eye Issue 1654
In This Issue
The top 10 places to avoid this summer as JD Vance holidays in the Cotswolds... Relief as Trump puts the thumbscrews on Putin... Yes, Prime Minister: secret script at last revealed... Nation has no interest in Sir Ed Davey proposals... An AI Doctor Writes... Conspiracy theory hits ironyometer... Shock as protester turns out to be middle class... Gregg Wallace diagnosed with ‘awfulism’... The Garden Path by Raynor Winn, as told to Craig Brown

Winn loss
Salt in the wounds for the Salt Path writer

Summit amiss
Update on the royal rift

Doctors & purses
MD on the latest doctors' strikes

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