Issue 1572
commentatorballs "Full of snap, crack and popple!"
NICK MULLINS
BT Sport

"This horse cost £14k, the other cost £250k. So it is, like you say, Samson and Goliath"
MICK FITZGERALD
ITV Racing

"Chelsea bowed out with their heads held high"
IAN DENNIS
Radio 4

"He [Daizen Maeda] has run himself into the ground. He is legless"
PAT BONNER
BBC Radio Scotland

"It can be very difficult to win this race twice, let alone once"
JOHN HUNT
Radio 4

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Private Eye Issue 1572
In This Issue
Ukraine delight at ‘fresh influx of weapons’ as fleeing Russian soldiers leave tanks and missiles behind… Grant Shapps and Robert Jenrick rescued by Ukrainians’ Homes for Conservatives scheme… Tennis world stunned as Wimbledon’s Pimms-sipping fuddy-duddies take strong moral stand on genocide… Triumph for dazzling Kate in powder blue coat as Harry and Meghan continue deluded international ego trip to open Invictus Games – Daily Mail exclusive… ‘I will build nuclear power station every year,’ claims man who cannot build one normal bridge… Harry hits out at ‘pale, male and stale’ white horses supporting Queen on her 96th birthday… ‘I don’t know who God thinks He is,” says top Tory theologian Jacob Rees-Mogg in Easter message… Chris Tarrant: 50 Years an Entertainer, as told to Craig Brown

Stage fight
More drama at the Actors’ Benevolent Fund

It’s an epidemic
PPE fraud during the pandemic

Pipeline dreams
Why Russian gas still flows west

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Private Eye Issue 1571
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