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Top stories in the latest issue:

LOST PROPERTIES
As the Tory party sheds donors and voters, beancounters fret that too many of its valuable property assets are held by bolshie local associations and trusts.

LAURA LAURA LOLLY!
As an expert on Westminster’s Brexit machinations, BBC political editor Laura Kuenssberg finds a lucrative new sideline.

HOW THEY ARE RELATED
Michael Gove wasn’t the only coke-sniffer at The Thunderer, according to Michael Ashcroft’s payback book, Dirty Politics, Dirty Times.

GONG FISHING
Shocking audit failures, from BHS to Carillion, are no bar to partners in the accountancy firms involved being decorated in the Queen’s birthday honours.

CLOSED FOR BUSINESS
Tory leadership candidate Sajid Javid claims to champion small businesses. Pity that as business secretary his department closed a service that did precisely that.

BUNGS UP
Health ministers bearing bailouts are desperate to keep some of the most deeply indebted NHS trusts from declaring that they are no longer a going concern.

NOOKS and CORNERS
Controversial plans for a new Holocaust Memorial and Learning Centre in Westminster gain a huge new boost in support.

SINAI WATCH
Why the UK should think twice about selling arms to Egypt for use in the war that’s been raging in Northern Sinai for the past six years.

COURT CIRCULAR
How Brenda & Co managed to hold their noses and charm what unofficial royal schedules referred to as the ‘Trumps In Town’, aka the TITs.

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Next issue on sale: 25th June 2019
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ALSO IN THIS ISSUE
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Private Eye Issue 1498
In This Issue
Mr Devil and Mr Deepbluesea Now Favourites for Number 10…From Dressed Grab to Fake Booze: That Trump State Banquet in Full… Love Island Contestants Demand Tory Leadership Meat Market is Axed… Headline Writers ‘Addicted to Stories About Michael Gove’s Cocaine Use’… Jeremy Corbyn Sparks Fury by Making People Feel Sorry for Alastair Campbell… China Sends Delegation of Tanks to Meet Protest Leaders… English Football Brought into Disrepute in France by Small Group of Women Giving Displays of Good Sportsmanship… Germaine Greer’s History of Art A-Z, as told to Craig Brown

Spent farce
The millions blown on Brexit

Help the needy
Tory cash crisis latest

Farage horizon
The EU’s far-right at war

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Private Eye Issue 1497