
Issue 1540

JASON MOHAMMAD
BBC2
“With Yan Bingtao there is no body language – he just sits there biting his nails”
STEPHEN HENDRY
BBC2
“Their legs were looking a little bit leggy”
GARETH ROBERTS
Radio 5 Live
“That's the ferrule on the end, the little brass bit that's made of titanium”
DENNIS TAYLOR
BBC2
“I'm sure when Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink went to bed last night all he wanted was a clean sheet”
MICHELLE OWEN
Quest
Please email your entries to balls@private-eye.co.uk. £10 paid for submissions printed in the magazine.