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Private Eye Issue 1556
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Prince Andrew to officially open a number of cupboards in which to hide – Court Circular exclusive… Panic buying starts as government promises there will be no October lockdown… Senior ministers vent fury at PM's national insurance rise by voting for it and not resigning… 'This is now the party for me,' says Jeremy Corbyn as tax-and-spend Tories fall behind in the polls… Raducanu victory on Amazon Prime and C4 signals end of the BBC… Relief as British weaponry left behind for Taliban turns out not to work… Keir Starmer unveils snappy 14,000- word Labour election slogan… Widespread joy as offices reopen and rush-hour traffic jams resume… Miriam Margolyes' Diary, as told to Craig Brown

Laughing stocks
Big Tory donors unfazed by the NI hike

Profits of doom
More rich pickings for Covid entrepreneurs

Teen vaccination
MD on the arguments for and against

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Private Eye Issue 1555
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