Issue 1490
agri brigade
With Bio-Waste Spreader: "With less than 40 days to go until the UK is due to leave the EU, more than 30 food and drink industry organisations, including the National Farmers’ Union, have told environment secretary Michael Gove they will have to break off cooperation with the government because of the ‘catastrophic’ risk of leaving with no withdrawal deal. Farmers, grain merchants, millers, bakers and large food retailers have told Gove that, rather than respond to his consultation papers on future government food and environmental policy, they will concentrate instead on simply trying to stay in business should the UK ‘crash out’ of the EU next month without a deal...”
medicine balls
With M.D.: "In 2012, Sue Allison, an experienced diagnostic radiographer at Morecambe Bay NHS Foundation Trust, observed that the director of the breast screening unit, a consultant radiologist, was not following best practice when assessing patients who had been recalled with suspicious mammograms. In line with the trust’s whistleblowing policy, Allison told her line manager and trades union. The poor practice was confirmed in audits by another whistleblower, but Allison alleges that the data was initially covered up by the North West Breast Screening Quality Assurance team, and the trust refused to investigate when concerns were reported to the medical director…”
eye tv
With Remote Controller: "Most broadcasters operate some sort of flagging system, requiring producers to warn high-ups of potentially controversial content. Three recent programmes will have had as many red flags flapping as a children’s beach with a storm forecast. Curiously, two of these hot-potato shows were served up by one of the BBC’s cosiest franchises. Call the Midwife started out in 2012 as a warm bath of 1950s nostalgia, set in Nonnatus House, a convent hospital staffed by a combination of nursing nuns and, to facilitate romantic storylines, secular medical staff. More recently it has become a series of liberal editorials on medical and social issues…
[reviews of Call the Midwife (BBC1) and The Making of Me (C4)].”
keeping the lights on
With Old Sparky: "Energy minister Claire Perry intends to lower the significant hurdles faced by onshore windfarm developers in England if she can find a politically convenient opportunity. However, a recent experience in Wales, where the devolved government’s support for wind power (coupled with lazy regulators) encourages developers to ride roughshod over local authorities, will do nothing to assist her…”
music and musicians
With Lunchtime O’Boulez: "Wolverhampton’s Civic Hall once boasted an impressive, rare and much-loved 1930s organ, the largest ever built by the firm of John Compton. It was regularly used for concerts – until the hall was closed for renovation and the organ was controversially removed on the grounds it took up too much space. Its 6,000-plus pipes were put into storage, and organ societies hoped it could find another home. But Wolverhampton council had other ideas and now the organ has been dumped in a landfill site…”
in the city
With Slicker: "A major row involving civil legal actions and a potential police investigation has broken out inside the family-owned food and property business of Tory MP Andrew Bridgen, run by his younger brother Paul. The brothers are the major shareholders in the AB Produce group and Bridgen Investments…”
eye world
Letter from Caracas
From Our Own Correspondent:
"If there is one symbol of the mess our country is in, it is state oil company Petroleos de Venezuela (PDVSA), which produces and exports most of our oil, earns almost all our money and is also one of our biggest borrowers, with debts of around $40bn. In its heyday around 30 years ago, PDVSA was considered the world’s best-run national oil company; it is now among the worst – and there is plenty of competition…”
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Next issue on sale: 19th March 2019
Private Eye Issue 1490
In This Issue
Mouse Denies Running Down Clock – Nursery Times Exclusive… Ratcliffe Leaves Sinking Ship RMS Brexitanic… PM ‘Needs More Time’ So Creates Extra Month Between February and March… Fresh Extinction Warning for David Attenborough Documentaries on the BBC… Donald Trump Creates New 51st State Called ‘Emergency’… White House Condemns Violence Against People President Trump Urges His Supporters to Attack… An Atheist Revolution, as told to Craig Brown

Man in the Eye
Tory party treasurer Ehud Sheleg

VAT’s life!
The supreme court’s supreme screw-up

Stupid boy
The gaffes of Gavin Williamson

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19th March 2019
Private Eye Issue 1489