Q: How brilliantly well are your negotiations with the EU going, to bring back an excellent new deal that will unite this country again and usher in a new Golden Age comparable to that of Pericles, Elizabeth the First and Sir Winston Churchill?

Good question, Mr Ian Sertname-Here. Beautifully put too. But yes! Now you come to mention it, the negotiations are going full steam ahead, the ice floes are cracking, there is movement under the keel.

There’s a groaning of the rivets and, if I can just take this nautical metaphor on, the good ship Britanic is no longer hurtling towards the iceberg of Brexit doom, but sailing happily towards a new future of trading with New York in record time.

There may be water round our ankles, the quartet may be playing “Abide With Me, Madam” and there may not be enough lifeboats for us all, but rest assured there are enough for me and my chums. Women and children last! Particularly if you can’t remember how many you’ve had and how many you’ve got. I trust that answers your question.

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