Columnists
Issue 1449
agri brigade
With Bio-Waste Spreader: "In a recent interview on the Andrew Marr Show, Marr asked environment secretary Michael Gove whether ‘very, very wealthy farmers’ who get huge amounts of money from the EU in farm subsidies would get less under a new British post-Brexit farm subsidy regime. Gove simply replied ‘Yes’; but he will soon come to realise how difficult it will be to single out extremely wealthy farmers (such as the Duke of Westminster or H&M chairman Stefan Persson) from the more numerous hard-up ones who will be severely compromised by any reductions in their subsidy payments…”
signal failures
With Dr B Ching: "As Eye 1445 predicted before the election, last week the Tories announced the bad news on rail electrification which they’d withheld from the electorate. The government expected the public to believe that their massive U-turns on electrifying to Sheffield, Nottingham and Swansea mean ‘new improvements’ for passengers and the ‘new technology’ of bi-mode trains makes disruptive electrification works pointless…”
eye tv
With Remote Controller: "Although there’s unlikely to be much political or public support for the BBC big earners, some of those outed for the amount they trouser deserve sympathy for the innumerate way in which the salaries were ranked. The disclosure in £50,000-wide bands takes no account of how much work is done for the money. For example, both Andy Brillo and Alan Botney appear in the £200,000-£250,000 list of presenters. But, for that wedge, Andy presents at least seven shows a week during the political season, plus extra gigs during elections, while Alan fronts around six editions of Imagine each year. Therefore, if both were in the middle of the band on £225,000, the BBC could be getting the highly competent Brillo for under a grand a show, while paying vain Botney around £40,000 for each of his outings. One presenter would represent excellent value to the licence payer, the other an astonishing waste of public money…
[review of the BBC Annual Report].”
nooks and corners
With Piloti: "The Church School in Old Brentford stands, or, more accurately, stood on the banks of the Thames, next door to and in the yard of the former St George’s Chapel and opposite Kew Gardens. It was founded by Sarah Trimmer in 1786 and a plaque announces that it was built in 1806 ‘for Religious Instruction and Industry, Supported by annual Subscriptions and Benefactions and the produce of the Children’s work’… This modest whitewashed brick building is listed, at Grade II, and is thought to be the only surviving purpose-built Georgian school of industry…”
in the city
With Slicker: "When big fees are on offer, there is no ass the City will not kiss, no boot it will not lick. Witness the alacrity with which the Fundamentally Complicit Authority bent over in a bid to ensure state-owned oil goliath Saudi Aramco lists in London rather than New York – where there is the risk of legal action by the families of 9/11 victims…”
eye world
Letter from Pretoria
From Our Own Correspondent: "
We knew ‘state capture’ went deep here in South Africa, but few knew how deep until around 200,000 emails known as #Guptaleaks from within the infamous Gupta family’s business empire were sent by a whistleblower to the Amabhungane investigative journalism team earlier this year. Ever since, Amabhungane, which means ‘dung beetles’, has ensured constant revelations of outrageous influence peddling in government, plus tender fixing and kickbacks in state-owned enterprises, particularly transport and energy giants Transnet and Eskom, all involving Gupta-owned companies…”
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Next issue on sale: 8th August 2017.
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In This Issue private eye
‘Stop Infighting and Unite to Lose Election’, PM Urges Cabinet… Dalek Overlooked Again as Role of Doctor Who Goes to a Human… Abuse in Politics Is the Fault of ‘All Those C***s on the Other Side’, Everyone Agrees… Tory MP Sacked for Saying Foul N-Word (ie ‘Nigel’)… Children Sad When Mother Died – Exclusive to All Newspapers… Boots Seeks Cheap Remedy After Late-Night Cock-up… Those John Humphrys Interviews in Full… Sarah, Duchess of York’s Diary, as told to Craig Brown

And also...

- BBC pay: The inside view from Remote Controller; plus Fleet Street’s glass house
- Listing badly: The City will do anything to host Saudi Arabia’s Aramco share sale

For all these stories you can buy the magazine or subscribe here and get delivery direct to your home every fortnight.

Private Eye Issue 1448