number crunching
Issue 1478

31% - Proportion of beat bobbies cut by police in past 3 years following government cuts to funding

8% - Proportion of MPs recommended to be cut from Commons by Boundary Commission, in plans which are not expected to get through parliament this month despite potential £50m saving
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Private Eye Issue 1478 In This Issue
Brexit Wasn’t Given a Chance, Says Brexiteer Who Quit – Daily Borisgraph Exclusive… Summer Plotting to End Soon to Make Way for Autumn Plotting… House Prices Crash to 2% Higher Than They Were… Let’s Parlez Franglais: La Guerre des Scallops… Trump Prevented from Attending McCain Funeral by Bone Spur… How TV’s Bodyguard is Really Brilliant and Based on Me, by All Female Former Home Sexretaries… Madonna: In Memoriam, 2018, as told to Craig Brown

Lootin’ with Putin
City suits and the Moscow gold rush

Galileo blow
It’s all about missile guidance, stupid!

Hype casting
Book trade goes overboard for Sally Rooney
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Private Eye Issue 1477