St Theresa

Bullying
Issue 1470
john-bercow.jpg Disturbing reports reach my desk about bullying and Mr Bercow.

There isn’t enough of it. I will not tolerate a lack of bullying of Mr Bercow, moderator of Debating Soc, who struts around the school in his academic gown as if he owns the place.

Frankly, he’s got a bit too big for his size 3 boots. To be honest, he can’t get his head through the Staff Room door and I would urge both pupils and staff alike to adopt his new nickname John Berk-Go! (I didn’t get this to start with, but Gavin 1 explained to me that it’s a witty suggestion that John is firstly a bit of a twit and that secondly he should give up his post and retire quietly to spend more time with his wife, if she’s still there.)

Or, if John doesn’t go, Gavin will unleash Cronos, the school spider, who is roughly the same size as Mr Berk-Go and almost as creepy (!), to frighten some sense into him.

TM.

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